Getting to Know Your Committee Members by Perry Davenport.
Perry: Hello, fellow vamps, this is Perry Davenport here to interview Committee Member Jack VanAllen. He has been on the Committee since 1878, making him the second-longest member after our fearless Head, Barnet Groves.
Jack: Shouldn’t that be second-longest serving member? I think Abe is the longest by six inches.
Perry: What are you, the grammar police?
Jack: Just pointing out the obvious.
Perry: Yeah, sure. So tell us, Jack. It’s a known fact you prefer positive blood to negative blood, but what we don’t know is how you can tell the difference. What makes negative blood so distasteful to you?
Jack: I thought you were going to ask me real questions during this interview.
Perry: That is a real question. One I got from a listener, even.
Jack: Fine. I don’t know why, but negative blood makes my stomach upset.
Perry: So, it’s psychosomatic?
Jack: It’s not psychosomatic. And if you wish to continue with this interview, I suggest you ask a different question.
Perry: Okay. Don’t be so touchy. Here’s a fun question for you. Boxers, briefs, or commando?
Jack: What male vampire wears undergarments? You?
Perry: Oh, well, no. Not me. Point taken. Next question. What’s your dream vacation?
Jack: Why would I want to take a vacation? I like my job.
Perry: But wouldn’t you like to just get away for a week?
Jack: And do what?
Perry: Okay, so you’re a workaholic. What do you do during your free time?
Jack: Sometimes I swim. Sometimes I read. Sometimes I work on my car.
Perry: (snapping fingers) Yes, your car. You own a 1965 Mustang, right?
Jack: Actually, it’s a 1964-1/2. First generation. Bought it brand new.
Perry: I bet that thing is worth a pretty penny.
Jack: I wouldn’t know. I don’t plan on selling it.
Perry: No, of course not. What other cars have you owned?
Jack: None. I like that one.
Perry: Not even before the Mustang? Maybe a Model T?
Jack: I walked faster than the Model T.
Perry: Well, yeah, didn’t we all? Okay, here’s a more serious question. The Committee hasn’t set a precedence, but what do you think of a vamp controlling a mortal for personal gain?
Jack: I know some vampires resort to that tactic, but I’d like to think they do it out of need and not fun. Still, while we are forced to control a mortal for feeding, we do not have to resort to that for fun. That is what our allure is for.
Perry: But isn’t that the same as controlling?
Jack: Not at all. It is just an attraction. The mortal can still say no. We vampires can be more persuasive in other ways, just as mortals are to one another. Do you control a mortal when you’re not feeding from them?
Perry: No. I mean, what’s the fun in that? I like a little interaction.
Perry: Will the Committee ever set a rule to prevent it?
Jack: As long as it’s not an issue, I doubt it. Mainly because there are times when the vampire is in need. And if we start making rules for every little thing, we might end up with another vampire war on our hands. And a war in this technological world would surely out us all. All the more reason to keep the calm.
Perry: Keep Calm and Avoid Publicity!
Perry: Never mind. Thanks for joining us today, Jack. It was a real pleasure.
Tonight Hubby and I might actually be able to attend our first Dragons game of the season (since the other first game was rained out). No rain is in sight tonight. At least, not until after midnight. Our second game is tomorrow and while there isn’t rain forecasted, it’s supposed to be colder. As my husband asked, “Don’t the weather Gods know it’s May?” Apparently not. I foresee going from chilly weather straight into 90 degree temps. There will be no beautiful days in between. I just know it!
So… It’s Friday the thirteenth today (my daughter’s favorite day). Are you superstitious? Sometimes I think superstition is just another form of OCD. What do you think?
Have a great weekend (and don’t walk under that ladder!).