Another Query - Aack!

Queries. They’re a bitch, aren’t they?

I swear it was easier writing the book then trying to convey 90,000 words into three short paragraphs. Which might not have been so bad if my book didn’t cross multiple genres.

It’s paranormal. It’s a romance. It’s suspenseful. I want so show them all.

I need a hook. I need to show conflict. Argh, argh, and more argh!

So, here I am again, with a query I need critiqued. If you want to comment – great (I value all criticism). If not, no biggie. I understand. I’m horrible when it comes to giving my opinion, too!

Maybe that’s why I find it so hard to ask for opinions!

Okay, so here goes nothing…

GHOSTLY LIAISON is a paranormal romance of 92,000 words.

After recovering from an accident and coma, Bridget Quigley is sure she’s going crazy, at least that’s her theory when she sees people appear and disappear in a blink of an eye. But when she accepts the house-sitting job for Rob Gentry, the hunky best man from her cousin’s wedding, she discovers she’s not going insane. She just sees ghosts and one in particular – Rob’s sister, Charlie.

Stuck in a world that can’t see or hear her, Charlie’s ecstatic when Bridget can and begs the woman to help her move on. Her murder was staged as a suicide, but Bridget won’t go to the authorities without proof and Charlie doesn’t have any. She suggests asking her brother.

Bridget secretly gleans information from Rob, only to find herself falling in love with the guy. What’s worse, he cares for her, too. But a relationship isn’t in the cards for her. Besides the whole ghost-seeing thing, the accident left her disfigured and unworthy. While her heart and head struggle for dominance, she gathers the proof she needs to help Charlie, and becomes the killer’s next target.

So, does it make sense? Can you tell what the book is about? Is there something majorly lacking? If this is the type of book you like to read, would you open the book?

Even if you don’t want to give an opinion, I thank you for reading this far!

My Dream

When I first started writing (all of two and half years ago), I didn't go into it expecting to be published, I did it to see if I could write a book. It wasn't until I wrote the book, and was told it had potential, that the niggling idea came to life. A dream of being published was born.

After polishing it and polishing it, I finally got enough nerve to submit that first book to contests. Results were mixed. I polished it some more. Then I went to the Romantic Times (RT) Convention and actually pitched it. Shortly after, I started querying agents.

Writing the query for that book opened my eyes. Some thought my book sounded like Twilight (it's not Twilight – not even an adult version of it) and I realized that maybe my book wasn't all that unique. But how was I to know? It's not like I read tons of vampire romance novels. I'd only read a few.

I've read lots more now. I still think my first book has unique aspects to it and I have numerous ideas for a series. It's just that my first book won't make a good first book in the series. Neither will my second, since it's a sequel to the first.

So I wrote a third. One that could kick-start a series. It really was my best, yet. Even the query was easy to write! And while I've had requests (and some requests are still in process), somewhere along the way the urgency to get an agent has diminished.

It's not like I've given up my search for an agent. More like I've slowed down to consider. I've heard the reasons I should continue. I've heard the reasons it's not necessary.

Self-publishing is a tempting apple, but I'm not ready to go that route. It requires a lot of work and time. Time I would rather spend writing. Maybe once I have several books under my belt, it'll be time I can spare.

There's still a part of me that wants that agent, though. Someone on my side who loves my writing. Helping me get better, helping me fulfill my dream. I don't know if that part will ever vanish completely, but I know I don't need an agent to fulfill my dream.

In the meantime, I will keep writing. And I will continue to query, because you just never know. It's like the lottery. You can't win unless you play. And while I do dream of winning the lottery (so I can quit the paying job), at least my dream of being published is a whole lot more realistic. With or without an agent.

I'm Back At It

I thought the second time around I was immune. Ha! Fooled me.

What am I talking about? Querying – and constantly checking my e-mail – that's what!

I laugh at myself. How pathetic can I be? I mean, I just sent out the queries. I know how busy agents are. I know it will take several weeks before they get back to me (if they respond at all, that is). Yet, as soon as I hit "send", all reason flies out the door.

I know it's unrealistic to think every agent will love my story, but I hope it anyway. And I know it only takes one "yes", so am I wrong in wishing for more than one? Am I greedy? Or just normal?

I so much want this book to be the one for me. The one that starts the ball rolling. So I'll post my query here and you tell me – would you want to read it?

When Committee Member Jack VanAllen wakes up in a snow bank with no recollection of how he got there, he's a little concerned. Vampires don't black out and they don't forget anything. When he discovers the woman who resembles his late wife lying beside him in the midst of turning, he's outraged. Unauthorized turnings are punishable by death.

Sunshine Petersen's New Year's resolution did not include immortality, but that's what she gets whether she likes it or not. She could come to love her new life if it included Jack. If only she hadn't accused him of turning her. It was an honest mistake. How was she supposed to know the difference between a bite for feeding and a bite for turning? Unfortunately, she doesn't remember who turned her.

While Jack is almost certain he didn't turn Sunshine, his lack of memory, her resemblance to his late wife, and his growing attraction to her isn't helping his case any. Could he have turned her or is someone setting him up? Should he do the honorable thing and turn himself in, hoping for leniency or take Sunshine and run, ensuring the death penalty if he's caught?

MY SUNNY VAMPIRE is a paranormal romance of 98,000 words.

I welcome all honest opinions!

My Query - Posted Here

First off, let me say - my job is not in jeopardy.  Apparently I expected the worst and only got bad (but I can live with bad - I might not be happy, but that's another thing).

Now on with the title of my post.  I've decided to post my query here.  For you few people who follow, I would really appreciate your opinion (and for those of you who read and don't follow - you can e-mail me separately if you want.  I won't mind).  I was told I finally "nailed it".  This, from a person who has read (and loves) my book.  I'd like to think I really did nail it, but I won't know until I start to use it.  I'm just not sure WHEN I want to use it.  Should I wait until I hear back from the contest in October or just GO FOR IT?  Decisions, decisions.  Anyway, here is the query for my book, THE UNCOMMON ONE, a paranormal romance.

When a newly undead vampire cautiously re-enters society, he falls in love with the one human who can expose him for what he is.

John Pennington is focused on becoming the perfect ordinary mortal. He moves into the city, buys a sports bar, and works as the bartender. Dating is out of the question – he is a vampire after all. Then he meets Sarah Daugherty.

He’s uncommonly drawn to her and touching her generates a warmth he never thought he would experience again. But keeping his identity a secret from her is tougher than he expected. Unlike other mortals, he can’t read her thoughts or enter her mind. If she should discover his identity he’d have no way to wipe her memory – standard practice for repairing vampire slip-ups.

Even with his fears, life is amazing with her in it. He feels more human around her and is unwilling to give that up. In love for the first time, he knows she’s a risk worth taking.

After surviving an abusive ex-husband, Sarah is wary of any man’s interest. But John is different. He seems to care what she thinks and values her opinion. Then she finds out what he is and runs. Unable to forget the loving and kind way he treated her, she realizes she cares for him and goes back to face the challenges of dating a vampire.

While they begin their relationship, someone else is determined to end it. Sarah’s life is in danger and John must find the person responsible before she’s lost to him forever.

Okay - so give me your best shot.  Does this intrigue you to want to read more (even if you're not into romance)?  I appreciate all comments.

Hodgepodge

I have recently (like, yesterday), revised my query - the letter I plan on sending out to more agents. I’m thinking about posting it on my blog and getting your opinion (and maybe spreading the news to the RWA chapters I belong to, to also check it out). Good idea? Bad? I’d like to know what you think about that.

Not that I blog everyday (I’m lucky to hit twice a week!), but next week I’ll be on vacation. We’re taking what I call a “car cruise”. Hitting cities we’ve never visited before. If I have access to the internet at night (and the odds are pretty much in our favor), I may post more often. That’s if I have any decent pictures or funny stories to share. Heck, I’m with my husband. I’m sure I’ll have at least one funny story to share. I’ll just have to remember to write it down when it happens or else I’ll forget.

Do you own an e-book reader? Do you want to? I’m still in the NO category on those things. Why mess with something that works? I just foresee problems with electronic gadgets in the future. AND the changes in formats (you know it’ll happen). I’ll stick with bound books.

In case I've never thanked you - I thank you for following my blog (or reading, if you’re here and don’t follow). It’s almost like writing a letter to a friend. That’s what I try to do here, anyway.

Waiting

I’m thinking about my first book too much again. The form rejections I received from the few agents I’ve queried haven’t helped any, either.

Should I change the beginning? Should I change the end? Should I change this scene or that? The questions never stop.

I keep telling myself to WAIT. Wait until I hear back from the last contest I entered. Wait until I have a chance to talk to my beta reader. Waiting is hard, though. I won’t get the results from the contest until October. Dang – can I really wait THAT long? At least I’m talking to my beta reader on Saturday (I hope, anyway!).

I’m afraid to send out more queries. If my book isn’t ready as it is, I don’t want to blow anymore chances. I want a good agent.

I’m hoping it’s all in my head, that I’m over-analyzing the whole thing. It’s what I do (and I’ve gotten very good at it).

So I will wait until I hear back from the contest. I owe my book that much. If I don’t final (and that is what my goal is, although winning would be SWEET), then it’s back to the drawing board (or the critique group). Because I will NOT give up on my book. It deserves its chance to be read.

My Query

I think I need to rework my query.

I was really hoping it wouldn’t come to that, but if that’s what it takes to get requests for partials, then I guess that’s what I need to do. It’s certainly not working as is.

Maybe that’s something I can do tonight while I’m waiting in line to see “Eclipse”. You read that right. I’ll be one of the crazy people out tonight to catch the midnight showing of the movie. Right along with my daughter. She might be able to help me write that darn query, too.

I am looking forward to the movie. We’ve been to the midnight showing of the other two (and froze in the November air), so it’s becoming a tradition for us. We’ll be doing the same when “Breaking Dawn” comes out, too (whenever that will be). What can I say – we’re hooked on the series.

So, maybe sitting outside in the relative warm air (the high is only supposed to get into the mid 70’s), among other “Twilight” fans, will inspire me to write a better query. One that will grab that agent and make them want to read more.

It’s my dream, and I’m sticking to it.

Mail

When I was younger (I could say “a kid”, but I was 13 and wouldn’t have liked to be called that THEN), I anxiously awaited each day for the mail. I loved getting mail. I had several pen pals and I would usually get something from someone. I got so much mail, I was friends with the mail man. His name was Don (and later on I would say hi to him on my letters to my parents – written on the front of the envelope so he could see).

Now, this was before e-mails and texting and blogs. I think I would have loved blogging back then! Texting, too! And Facebook!

I loved writing letters, but I loved receiving them more.

I haven’t changed.

I look to see if anyone commented on my blog. I look to see if anyone sent me a message on Facebook. And now I anxiously check my e-mail – several times a day – to see if I’ve heard back from an agent. It’s ridiculous the amount of times in a day I’ve gone and checked. I’ve read about others who have done that and I thought – not me. I wouldn’t do that. HA!

So beware – those of you who have yet to send out queries. Your obsession with e-mail will come! I think it’s a rite of passage.