An Example of Life With My Hubby

I’m practicing my writing and thought I would try telling you a true story. Now, the comments in quotes are not verbatim (I’m not that great at remembering exact lines), but the gist is there.

In February of 2008 we took a vacation to Orlando. The “we” consisted of my husband, my son, our dear friend (whose time share we used), and me. Did the whole Disney thing, too; hitting every park. It’s not something I plan on doing again, unless my kids decide to actually date, get married, and give me grandchildren (but I’m not griping – really).

The worst part of the whole trip was the week we took it. That was the year OSU met LSU in the BCS Championship game. And lost.

That was also the week of LSU’s spring break. Yeah, in FEBRUARY! Apparently, they’re off the week before Mardi Gras and they all went to Orlando to get away. Needless to say, the days my husband wore his OSU shirts, he got quite a ribbing. It really was the worst week we could have chosen to go. Way too many people!

It wasn’t anything we could change, though, so we stuck to our schedule. We got lucky on the day we went to the Animal Kingdom Theme park: no rain (yes, it actually rains in Florida in the winter – go figure).

Deciding our feet would hurt too much in the afternoon, we took the walking part of the park in the morning (the walking part consisted of the zoo and jungle-type habitats). As we came across the gorilla habitat, there happened to be a gentleman discussing the gorillas and asked if anyone had questions. That’s when my husband spoke up.

“What do gorillas taste like?” he asked.

The gentleman stared at him and paused before answering. “I don’t know, I’ve never eaten one.”

“Well, if you did, what do you think it would be like? Chicken or beef? White meat or dark?”

“Well, I guess they would have dark meat, similar to beef, but I really don’t know.” He was clearly perplexed as to why my husband would want to know that.

And to tell you the truth, I don’t think my husband honestly cared what the answer was. He just likes to play these kinds of games. And this one was on.

He found several other employees in the zoo portion of the park and asked them the same question, claiming he couldn’t get an answer from the so-called “expert”. One employee thought chicken, another also thought beef. Still, no one knew for certain.

Finally finished with the walking part, we headed for the Dinosaur ride. As we stood in line, there was an employee standing at the entrance, probably making sure no short people were unaccompanied, when my husband decided to ask him.

The man’s answer surprised my husband. “Turtle,” he said.

“Turtle? Really?”

“That’s what I heard.”

“Hmm, I don’t know what turtle tastes like,” my husband said. I was afraid he was going to start asking people what turtle tasted like, but that never occurred (or it never occurred for him to ask, I don’t know which).

After lunch, as we were cleaning up our mess (yes, we’re good little visitors!), my husband spotted an employee, a young woman, standing in front of the monkey exhibit.

“I’ve been asking people all over this park and have yet to get a definite answer,” my husband said. “Do you think you can help me?”

She smiled and said, “I’ll try.”

“Do YOU know what gorilla tastes like?”

By this time, we were all cringing. We really were getting tired of the question by now. But the woman’s answer was the BEST!

“Oh, YOU’RE the one,” she said.

“I’m the one, what?” he asked.

“Everyone at lunch talked about this guy asking what gorilla tasted like. I didn’t know what they were talking about.” We all busted out laughing.

And you know what? That made my husband’s day! I think it was what he was hoping for all along. To be remembered! While the rest of us were glad he stopped asking that darn question!